Schedule

Patient Portal

Calendar

Call

Laugh It Out: Using Comedy to Explore Emotions and Build Confidence

As a therapist, I’ve noticed something surprising: the tools of comedy often overlap with the tools of healing. Both ask us to notice what’s real, hold it up to the light, and sometimes exaggerate it until we can finally laugh. Comedy, like therapy, is not about pretending things are easy—it’s about finding new ways to face what’s hard.

Some people worry they’re “not funny enough” to use humor. But here’s the good news: comedy isn’t just for comedians. It’s a way of framing life’s challenges that can help all of us process emotions and build confidence.

Why Comedy Belongs in Emotional Work

Both comedy and therapy invite us to be honest about being human. A good therapist and a good comedian share one skill in common: noticing the small truths that often go unspoken.

Laughter lowers our defenses, helping us feel safe enough to explore what’s underneath. In fact, research shows that humor can reduce anxiety and stress while strengthening resilience (Martin, 2007). When we can laugh at the absurdity of our struggles, we loosen the grip those struggles hold on us.

Comedy as Emotional Language

Comedy has its own set of tools that map beautifully onto emotional exploration:

• Exaggeration – Sometimes, the best way to see an emotion clearly is to blow it up cartoon-size. Imagine saying, “I was a tiny bit nervous” versus “My stomach was hosting a three-ring circus.” Exaggeration makes invisible feelings visible.
• Timing and pause – Comedians know the power of silence before the punchline. In emotional work, that pause is the same as allowing ourselves to feel before rushing to fix.
• Juxtaposition – Comedy thrives on opposites colliding. So does emotional honesty. We’re often sad and hopeful, scared and brave, all at once.

Psychologist Rod A. Martin (2010) notes that humor helps us reframe experiences in ways that promote healthier coping. In therapy, that might mean taking something shameful and giving it a playful re-tell—suddenly, the weight shifts.

Building Confidence Through Play

Comedy is rehearsal for courage.

When we play with characters, voices, or silly scenarios, we practice letting go of perfectionism. If a joke doesn’t land, nothing explodes—we just try again. That safety builds resilience. Playful risk-taking teaches us to trust ourselves even when the outcome is uncertain.

Try this exercise: take a personal story and tell it three ways—serious, slapstick, and sarcastic. Notice how each version changes not just how you tell the story, but how you feel about it.

Research supports this, too. Playful expression is linked to greater confidence and adaptability in both children and adults (Proyer, 2017). In other words: play really does help us grow up strong.

Using Humor to Build Connection

Laughter is one of the fastest ways to bond. When we laugh together, we’re saying: “I see the world like you do, at least for this moment.”

In therapy or daily life, shared humor can normalize vulnerability. A gentle self-deprecating joke, used carefully, can make others feel safer sharing their own imperfections. The point isn’t to mask pain, but to make space for honesty.

Here’s a small challenge: today, notice one moment when you could choose play instead of pressure. Maybe it’s singing your grocery list out loud, or sending a friend a goofy emoji when you really want to say “I’m stressed.” Those tiny choices remind us we can meet life with more lightness.

Gentle Cautions

Of course, humor isn’t a cure-all. Sometimes jokes can be used as shields, protecting us from feelings we’re not ready to face. And not every joke is healing—context, timing, and consent matter.

As therapist and researcher Albert Ellis once said, “Humor is the most powerful tool we have for maintaining perspective—so long as it’s not used to deny our pain” (Ellis, 1987). The key is laughter with, not laughter at.

Closing Thoughts

Comedy is not about escape—it’s about expression. When we laugh at our own contradictions and exaggerations, we practice being braver, messier, and more human.

So, here’s my invitation: sometime this week, pick one emotion and exaggerate it until it’s funny. See how it feels to give your sadnes

s a slapstick edge, or your stress a sarcastic voice. You might find that comedy doesn’t make emotions disappear—it makes them shareable, workable, and, just maybe, a little lighter.

Because you don’t have to be a comedian to use humor in your life. You just have to be human.

Blog written by Sentier therapist, Levi Weinhagen, MSW, LGSW.

Like this blog?! Check out Levi’s teen comedy group (Finding the Funny: Using Comedy to Explore Feelings) that is coming this winter.

References

• Ellis, A. (1987). Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy. Springer.
• Martin, R. A. (2007). The Psychology of Humor: An Integrative Approach. Elsevier Academic Press.
• Martin, R. A. (2010). “Humor as an Adaptive Coping Strategy.” Positive Psychology Research.
• Proyer, R. T. (2017). “A new structural model for the study of adult playfulness: Assessment and exploration of an understudied individual differences variable.” Personality and Individual Differences, 108, 113–122.