My Teen is Depressed

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talking to your teen about depression

Since the onset of the pandemic, mental health concerns, including depression have risen globally. It makes sense that this is the case. Events that people look forward to have been canceled, people are isolated, and there is uncertainty about when the pandemic will end, creating a perfect storm for depression to manifest. Not to mention depressive symptoms that existed before the pandemic. If your teen is depressed, that is completely understandable.

What can you do as a parent?

It is really important that you find a way to be a support person for your teen. You can show them by saying validating statements. Validating statements acknowledge that someone else’s feelings make sense. Some examples include:

  • “I can tell that this is a really hard time for you.”
  • “You are not alone.”
  • “I’m sorry it is so difficult right now.”
  • “I understand you are feeling depressed.”

Validating statements help teens (adults and children too) feel seen, heard, understood and they strengthen relationships. Here are some examples of invalidating statements (these are the types of statements to avoid):

  • “Why are you depressed, you have such a good life, you have no reason to feel that way.”
  • “I had it way worse when I was a kid.”
  • “Just be happy.”
  • “You are just being dramatic.”

A lot of times people are inadvertently invalidating. Some invalidating statements are really well-meaning. For example, telling someone to focus on the positive may genuinely be trying to help someone feel better. However, it could also convey that they SHOULDN’T feel the way that they do. We want to be compassionate and let teens know that how they are feeling is okay.

You can let your teen know that they can always come to talk to you about feeling depressed/sad/down. It is okay if your teen declines this. Pressing your teen to talk when they do not want to will not build trust or strengthen the relationship. Your teen will likely open up more over time as they see that you are a safe, trustworthy, validating person to go to.

Sometimes with depression, people have suicidal thoughts. This, of course, is very scary and painful as a parent. If you have concerns for your teen’s safety, you can call or text a teen crisis line at 988 or bring them directly to the emergency room.

At Sentier, we have multiple therapists who specialize in working with teens. If you think your teen needs additional support, please reach out today!

Blog written by Sentier therapist Andrea Schroeder, MS, LPCC..

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